F L O U R I S H

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A Neurodiveristy affirming Group, Course and Workbook for ADHD Women

Group Introduction

Hello, and welcome to Flourish! A group that meets weekly and is specially designed to support women who have been diagnosed with ADHD. I'm SO happy you've decided to join!

You are the first group of women to be a part of this.

First, let’s begin with an overview of what you can expect over the coming weeks.

Flourish is a mutual self-help coaching group for women with ADHD. It is not a therapy group. This group will provide emotional, psychological, and moral support, as well as education and skills for its members.

Each of us is encouraged to participate to the extent we feel comfortable. The only rules are to be respectful and kind, and to treat one another with compassion, as you would want to be treated.

Also, please respect the privacy of all our group members and remember not to share the names of other members outside the group. You are not required to give any identifying information if you choose not to.

Our group will consist of a message board, video modules, and group meetings to discuss and share the week's topics.

In this group, you will learn new skills to manage your life as a woman with ADHD in a supportive community. We will do this through reflection and conversation.

You will also examine how growing up neurotypical as a neurodivergent person has impacted you.

You will learn skills of self-advocacy/self-accommodation, self-awareness, self-compassion, and self-care. By the end of this group, you will have a greater sense of confidence and self-trust, something many neurodivergent people lack because they are othered as a minority in a neurotypical world. Let's dive right into some definitions and explanations.

What is ADHD?

ADHD: A Genetic, Chronic, Neurodevelopmental, Brain-Based Difference

ADHD isn't caused by parenting, diet, or actions in childhood. ADHD can be caused by harm to the brain during pregnancy or birth, such as from lead poisoning or, in rare cases, a head injury.

ADHD: A Highly Inheritable Condition

According to Russell Barkley – a leading researcher and authority on ADHD – it's more inheritable than height. This means if you have it, someone in your family likely does too.

What Do We Know About ADHD Brains?

Researchers have begun to identify the structural and chemical differences in the brain that may cause the symptoms associated with ADHD. These differences explain challenges with executive functioning, motor response inhibition, memory, emotion, and behavior.

We know that ADHD brains are different in several ways:

• Specific areas of the cortex differ.
• Cortical tissues vary.
• The parietal and cerebellar regions differ.
• The basal ganglia and white matter tracts connecting different brain areas are different.

All these differences explain challenges that individuals with ADHD face. They also have unusually high functional connectivity between brain regions involved in selective visual attention, explaining difficulty in choosing what to focus on.

ADHD and Neurotransmitters

The brain acts as the body's control center, sending and receiving electrical signals. Nerve cells, or neurons, enable this communication, but there's a gap between neurons that must be bridged.

Neurotransmitters bridge this gap, allowing messages to be transmitted. Dopamine, which serves many functions, is one of the most important neurotransmitters.

Dopamine travels through four pathways in the brain, transmitting crucial information. Two of these pathways, the mesocortical and dopamine reward pathways, are linked to cognitive impairment in ADHD.

Thomas Brown describes ADHD this way:

"The primary problem is related to chemicals manufactured, released, and reloaded at the level of synapses, the junctions between certain networks of neurons that manage the brain's management system. Persons with ADHD tend not to release enough of these essential chemicals or to release and reload them too quickly. ADHD medication helps smooth out this process."

ADHD and Genes

Though a single gene causing ADHD hasn't been identified, recent research has found two groupings related to ADHD, with new discoveries made regularly.

ADHD and Executive Functioning

Executive functions include:

• Organizing
• Coordinating
• Prioritizing
• Maintaining routine
• Achieving goals
• Initiating tasks
• Switching tasks
• Staying motivated
• Time management
• Remembering details
• Emotional regulation
• Impulse control

The Symphony Metaphor

@Thomas Brown likens executive functions to a symphony's conductor. Without a conductor:

• Musicians struggle to maintain pace and volume.
• Coordination is challenging.
• Keeping timing is hard.
• Music selection becomes problematic.

When you struggle with executive functioning, life can feel chaotic, akin to a conductor-less symphony.

The Gold Standard Woman

What implications does the struggle with executive functioning have for women? Women with ADHD often grapple with stigma, shame, and embarrassment because they might struggle with tasks women are "expected" to excel at.

They often compare themselves to the "gold standard" woman: exceptionally organized, focused, motivated, and resilient. They may feel they're constantly playing "catch up" and need more support. Seeking help can bring about intense feelings of failure.

To cope, women often develop elaborate strategies. These strategies, while sometimes helpful, can be exhausting.

Some common "skills" include hiding, silencing oneself, seeking approval, and perfectionism.

As women age, many of these strategies become ineffective, potentially leading to anxiety, burnout, resentment, and depression.

Group Framework

The purpose of this group is to build participants' self-confidence and trust. We'll introduce new coping skills to replace old, potentially ineffective ones.

Key skills to develop include:

Self-Compassion

Learning to recognize challenges and show kindness to oneself, while also taking proactive steps for improvement.

Self-Accommodation

Understanding how to adapt one's environment to reduce stress, minimize sensory overload, and bolster executive functions.

Self-Advocacy

Confidently expressing feelings, needs, and thoughts when safe to do so.

Self-Awareness

Increasing understanding of personal thoughts, emotions, and bodily signals with kindness, curiosity, and non-judgment.

Self-Care

Developing methods for personal well-being and healthier interactions with loved ones.

Remember, these new coping skills can bolster self-trust and confidence.

Group Exercise: Deconstructing the 'Gold Standard Woman

Objective: The goal of this exercise is to explore the societal construct of the 'Gold Standard Woman,' understand its impact on self-perception, particularly among women with ADHD, and discuss how it can lead to feelings of shame and the need to mask one's true self. Question 1 - Defining the 'Gold Standard Woman': Describe your interpretation of the 'Gold Standard Woman.' This figure is an imaginary ideal often perceived as the epitome of perfection, against which all women find themselves compared.

Question 2 - Impact on Self-Perception: Reflect on how your comparison to this 'Gold Standard Woman' has influenced your self-perception. Feel free to share any thoughts, feelings, or experiences you're comfortable discussing.

Question 3 - Masking and the 'Gold Standard Woman': Consider whether you've ever felt compelled to 'mask' your ADHD symptoms or characteristics to align more closely with the 'Gold Standard Woman.' How has this affected you and your understanding of your ADHD?

I’d like to credit The Autistic Advocacte Keiran Rose with the idea of the Gold Standard Person. You can learn about him at his website here.