RSD TEXT

RSD

Flourishing Beyond Rejection Senstivity

Who has Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD)?

Many individuals with depression, anxiety, borderline personality disorder, depression, bipolar disorder, and autism

may experience rejection sensitivity dysphoria (RSD), but it appears to be more prevalent among women with ADHD.

The reason why people get RSD is not known for sure. William Dodson, a doctor specializing in adhd, thinks it might

be because of differences in the ADHD brain.

However, women with ADHD often feel alone and judged throughout their lives. People say that by age 12, children

with ADHD have heard 2,000 more negative comments than kids without it. We don't know exactly how these negative

comments affect people with ADHD, but they might be connected to RSD.

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RSD

Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria

What is RSD?

RSD is feeling extra sensitive to the idea of being rejected. This can happen because of many things, like

being afraid of failing or making mistakes, feeling disappointed, or getting criticized. It can even happen if you think these things might happen.

Other important things to know

RSD can be felt as actual pain. It can be excruciatingly painful, whether it really happened or you just thought about or imagined it.

You might have difficulty coping and doing your daily activities when you experience rsd.

It can sometimes take days or weeks to recover from an incident of rsd.

It's hard to regulate your emotions when you have an rsdn incident, and you may feel stuck thinking about what happened.

Sometimes you may even start to get depressed.

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RSD

Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria

L e t ' s t a k e a l o o k a t s o m e o f t h e d i f f i c u l t i e s R S D m i g h t c a u s e y o u .

S h a m e a n d R S D

S h a m e i s c a u s e d b y R S D , w h i c h m a k e s y o u f e e l

i n a d e q u a t e a n d u n w o r t h y . S h a m e i s t o u g h t o o v e r c o m e a n d l e a d s t o h i d i n g . S h a m e i s n o t t h e s a m e a s g u i l t ,

w h i c h i s a n a t u r a l f e e l i n g w h e n y o u d o s o m e t h i n g w r o n g . S h a m e m a k e s y o u f e e l l i k e Y O U a r e w r o n g .

W o m e n o f t e n a v o i d t r y i n g a n d m a k i n g m i s t a k e s b e c a u s e i t ' s s o p a i n f u l .

H o w e v e r , a v o i d i n g m i s t a k e s l e a d s t o a l i m i t e d l i f e .

M a k i n g m i s t a k e s i s e s s e n t i a l f o r l e a r n i n g a n d g r o w t h . W e ' l l d i s c u s s t h i s m o r e i n a l a t e r s e s s i o n .

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RSD

Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria

P e r f e c t i o n i s m a n d R S D

P e r f e c t i o n i s m m a y b e t r i g g e r e d b y R e j e c t i o n S e n s i t i v e D y s p h o r i a ( R S D ) .

R S D c a n l e a d t o p e o p l e - p l e a s i n g b e h a v i o r a n d h i d i n g .

W h e n s o m e o n e w i t h R S D e x p e r i e n c e s s h a m e , t h e y m a y t r y t o a v o i d t h o s e f e e l i n g s b y w o r k i n g e v e n h a r d e r t o p l e a s e

o t h e r s a n d a v o i d d i s a p p o i n t m e n t . T r y i n g t o b e p e r f e c t a n d

p l e a s e o t h e r s i s e x h a u s t i n g a n d d i f f i c u l t t o m a i n t a i n .

L a s h i n g O u t

R S D m a y c a u s e y o u t o l a s h o u t a t o t h e r s a s w e l l , l e a d i n g t o m o r e s h a m e a n d m o r e a v o i d a n c e .

M a s k i n g , h i d i n g , a v o i d a n c e a n d p e r f e c t i o n i s m c a n l e a d t o u n h a p p i n e s s a n d i n a u t h e n t i c i t y . O u r f r a m e w o r k c a n

p r o v i d e n e w w a y s t o c o p e w i t h R S D . L e t ' s l o o k a t s o m e i d e a s .

T h e r e a r e l o t s t o t r y , a n d s o m e m i g h t n o t w o r k f o r y o u . J u s t d o w h a t f e e l s r i g h t .

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RSD

RSD and Self Care Skills

Practicing self-care can help reduce RSD episodes. For instance, people are more emotionally regulated when they get enough sleep and maintain a healthy blood sugar level. Also, the less you push yourself beyond what you are comfortable doing, the less likely you will tip from challenge into overwhelm.

Working to care for yourself well will decrease rsd episodes. Ideas for self care to decrease RSD

Prune your life of unsupportive people.

Address uninformed people in your life regarding your rsd ( see last section).

Assess and address toxic or unhealthy work environments.

Practice staying in your regulated stress zones through self awareness and necessary self accommodations.

Establish and maintain regular sleep and eating habits.

Be aware of how your hormonal cycle affects your emotions and plan accordingly.

Connect with supportive people to avoid feeling isolated.

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RSD

RSD and Self Care Skills

A note on Medications

Medications can help with rejection sensitivity, according to Bill Dodson. Dodson recommends alpha agonists like clonidine or guanfacine.

Women report they are wearing emotional armor while taking these medications and feel more able to manage intense dysregulation. This armor protects them and helps them choose their responses to situations feeling s a g reater sense of self- trust.

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RSD

RSD and Self Advocacy SKills

One effective approach to managing rejection sensitivity dysphoria ( RSD) is to educate your partner, friends, and family about the condition. By sharing what you're learning and practicing self-care, you can help them understand your experiences and receive therapeutic support. Self-advocacy plays a crucial role in treating yourself with the love, care, and respect you deserve.

Teaching Loved Ones about RSD

Use the following phrase to help explain RSD:

Feels Like Pain

"RSD can feel like physical pain in my body, just like it causes you physical pain. I learned that I share this in common with other people who have ADHD and other forms of neurodivergence. Do you remember when you (fill in the blank with an incident of physical pain)? One thing you can do to help me is to remember that your words can cause me physical pain; if you aren't careful with your words, it hurts me, and it can take me a long time to heal."

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RSD

RSD and Self Advocacy SKills

M o r e T i p s t o S h a r e w i t h Y o u r P a r t n e r , F r i e n d s , o r F a m i l y :

E n c o u r a g e p o s i t i v e f e e d b a c k :

" P l e a s e r e m e m b e r t o t e l l m e t h e t h i n g s I h a v e b e e n d o i n g w e l l . "

B e a w a r e o f f a c i a l e x p r e s s i o n s :

" P l e a s e b e c o n s c i e n t i o u s o f y o u r f a c i a l e x p r e s s i o n . I l e a r n e d t h a t I c o u l d b e r e a l l y s e n s i t i v e t o f a c i a l e x p r e s s i o n s , w h i c h c a n h a v e a s i g n i f i c a n t i m p a c t o n m e . "

U s e c o l l a b o r a t i v e p h r a s e s :

" W h e n y o u g i v e m e f e e d b a c k o r a s k m e t o d o t h i n g s , a r e y o u w i l l i n g t o u s e c o l l a b o r a t i v e p h r a s e s s o I d o n ' t f e e l s h a m e d o r c o n t r o l l e d ? " E x a m p l e s : " W o u l d y o u b e o p e n t o . . . " , " W o u l d y o u b e w i l l i n g t o . . . " , " I w o u l d l o v e i t i f y o u w o u l d . . . "

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RSD

RSD and Self Advocacy SKills

C h e c k - i n b e f o r e i n i t i a t i n g c o n v e r s a t i o n s :

" I f y o u c h e c k f i r s t w i t h m e t o m a k e s u r e t h a t I a m f e e l i n g g o o d , r e g u l a t e d , a n d c a l m , i t c a n h e l p m e a v o i d t h e p a i n o f R S D . "

E x a m p l e : " I s t h i s a n o k a y t i m e t o d i s c u s s X ?

H o w d o y o u f e e l a b o u t t a l k i n g a b o u t t h i s r i g h t n o w ? "

V a l i d a t e f e e l i n g s :

" W i l l y o u v a l i d a t e a n d l i s t e n t o m y f e e l i n g s ? W h e n I

h a v e f e e l i n g s , i t c a n h e l p i f y o u j u s t l i s t e n f o r t h e m a n d r e f l e c t t h e m b a c k t o m e r a t h e r t h a n t e l l i n g m e i f t h e y a r e r i g h t o r w r o n g . R e m i n d i n g m e t h a t m y t h o u g h t s a n d f e e l i n g s m a t t e r t o y o u i s r e a l l y h e l p f u l a n d w i l l d e c r e a s e R S D f o r m e , h e l p i n g m e t o f e e l s a f e . I h a v e h a d m a n y y e a r s w h e r e I w a s t a u g h t m y t h o u g h t s a n d f e e l i n g s d i d n ' t m a t t e r . "

Se l f - A dv o c a c y N o t e s :

M e n t a l he a l t h pro f e s s i o na l s s o m e t i m e s m i s d i a g no s e R SD a s b i po l a r d i s o rde r o r bo rde r l i ne pe r s o na l i t y d i s o rde r i n w o m e n . I t i s e s s e n t i a l t o be a w a re o f t h i s po s s i b i l i t y a nd a dv o c a t e f o r y o urs e l f t o e ns ure a n a c c ura t e d i a g no s i s a nd a ppro pri a t e s uppo r t .

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The Amygdala Hijack and RSD

T h e a m y g d a l a , o n e o f t h e m o s t p r i m i t i v e p a r t s o f o u r

b r a i n , c o n t i n u o u s l y c o l l e c t s d a t a f r o m o u r f i v e s e n s e s a n d r e m a i n s o n t h e l o o k o u t f o r d a n g e r o u s s i t u a t i o n s w h e r e i t m u s t a c t . W h e n t h e a m y g d a l a s e n s e s d a n g e r , r e a l o r

i m a g i n e d , i t s e c r e t e s a s e r i e s o f h o r m o n e s t h a t s i g n a l t h e f i g h t / f l i g h t / f r e e z e r e s p o n s e t o o c c u r .

T h e a m y g d a l a i s l i k e l y r e s p o n s i b l e f o r R S D . I n o r d e r t o

r e s p o n d w i t h y o u r t h i n k i n g b r a i n , y o u n e e d t o c a l m d o w n a n d r e c o v e r f r o m t h i s h i j a c k , s o b r e a t h i n g , r e s t i n g , a n d

r e s t o r i n g y o u r b o d y t o a c a l m p l a c e i s e s s e n t i a l b e f o r e y o u t r y t o t h i n k a b o u t w h a t h a p p e n e d .

W h e n R S D h i t s , g o o d j u d g m e n t a n d t h i n k i n g c a n g o o f f l i n e . W h a t h e l p s m o s t i s c r e a t i n g a s e n s e o f s a f e t y f o r y o u r s e l f w h e n y o u h a v e a n R S D e p i s o d e , s o y o u r b r a i n g e t s t h e

s i g n a l t h a t y o u a r e s a f e , y o u r a m y g d a l a c a l m s d o w n , a n d y o u r t h i n k i n g b r a i n c a n r e - e n g a g e .

R S D e p i s o d e s c a n b e q u i t e t r a u m a t i c . L e t ' s l o o k a t s o m e w a y s t o c r e a t e s a f e t y i n r e s p o n s e t o a n R S D e p i s o d e .

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RSD

Grounding

G r o u n d i n g i s a w a y t o c o p e w i t h t r a u m a a n d h e a l . I t h e l p s y o u c o n n e c t w i t h t h e p r e s e n t m o m e n t a n d c a n m a k e y o u f e e l c e n t e r e d , s a f e , o r d i s t r a c t e d . W h e n y o u g r o u n d

y o u r s e l f , y o u r e m i n d y o u r s e l f t h a t y o u a r e i n

a d i f f e r e n t s i t u a t i o n t h a n t h e o n e t h a t c a u s e d t h o s e f e e l i n g s .

I f y o u ' r e f e e l i n g o v e r w h e l m e d , t r i g g e r e d o r v e r y

d i s t r e s s e d , g r o u n d i n g t e c h n i q u e s c a n h e l p y o u c a l m d o w n .

5 , 4 , 3 , 2 , 1

1 . S i t d o w n o r s t a n d u p s t r a i g h t a n d t a k e a d e e p b r e a t h .

2 . L o o k a r o u n d a n d f i n d 5 t h i n g s t h a t y o u c a n s e e i n y o u r s u r r o u n d i n g s .

T h e y c a n b e a n y t h i n g , s u c h a s a p i c t u r e o n t h e w a l l o r a p l a n t i n t h e r o o m . N a m e e a c h i t e m o u t l o u d .

3 . N e x t , f i n d 4 t h i n g s t h a t y o u c a n t o u c h . T h e y c a n b e a n y t h i n g w i t h i n y o u r

r e a c h , s u c h a s y o u r c l o t h i n g o r t h e s u r f a c e o f a d e s k .

T o u c h e a c h i t e m a n d f o c u s o n h o w i t f e e l s a g a i n s t y o u r s k i n .

4 . N o w , f i n d 3 t h i n g s y o u c a n h e a r . L i s t e n c a r e f u l l y f o r a n y s o u n d s a r o u n d

y o u , s u c h a s t h e h u m o f a f a n o r t h e s o u n d o f t r a f f i c o u t s i d e . N a m e e a c h s o u n d o u t l o u d .

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RSD

Grounding

5 . M o v e o n t o 2 t h i n g s y o u c a n s m e l l . T a k e a d e e p

b r e a t h i n a n d t r y t o d e t e c t a n y s m e l l s i n t h e a i r , s u c h a s t h e s c e n t o f a c a n d l e o r t h e a r o m a o f f o o d c o o k i n g .

F o c u s o n e a c h s m e l l a n d t r y t o i d e n t i f y i t b y n a m i n g i t .

6 . F i n a l l y , f i n d 1 t h i n g y o u c a n t a s t e . T h i s c a n b e s o m e t h i n g y o u a r e c u r r e n t l y e a t i n g o r d r i n k i n g , o r y o u c a n s i m p l y f o c u s o n t h e t a s t e i n y o u r m o u t h . P a y a t t e n t i o n t o t h e f l a v o r a n d t e x t u r e o f t h e i t e m .

7 . R e p e a t t h e e x e r c i s e a s m a n y t i m e s a s n e e d e d u n t i l y o u f e e l m o r e c o n n e c t e d t o y o u r s u r r o u n d i n g s a n d

l e s s o v e r w h e l m e d b y y o u r t h o u g h t s o r e m o t i o n s .

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Activate Your Parasympathetic Nervous System

E x p o s i n g y o u r b o d y t o a c u t e c o l d c o n d i t i o n s , s u c h a s t a k i n g a c o l d s h o w e r o r s p l a s h i n g c o l d w a t e r o n y o u r f a c e

, i n c r e a s e s v a g u s n e r v e s t i m u l a t i o n . W h i l e y o u r b o d y a d j u s t s t o t h e c o l d , s y m p a t h e t i c a c t i v i t y d e c l i n e s , a n d

p a r a s y m p a t h e t i c a c t i v i t y i n c r e a s e s .

You can also go for a walk or exercise and it may have a similar effect.

Shift Your Focus

E n g a g e i n a n i n t e r e s t i n g o r e x c i t i n g a c t i v i t y .

W i l l i a m D o d s o n s u g g e s t s t h a t g e t t i n g i n v o l v e d i n s o m e t h i n g y o u e n j o y c a n h e l p r e d u c e e p i s o d e s o f R e j e c t i o n S e n s i t i v e D y s p h o r i a ( R S D ) .

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RSD

Using Imagery for Safety WHY?

I m a g e r y i s a p o w e r f u l t o o l f o r c a l m i n g d o w n a s c a r e d o r t r a u m a t i z e d m i n d b e c a u s e i t t a p s i n t o t h e b r a i n ' s a b i l i t y

t o v i s u a l i z e a n d c r e a t e v i v i d m e n t a l s c e n e s . T h e s e s c e n e s c a n p r o v i d e a s e n s e o f c o m f o r t , r e l a x a t i o n , a n d s a f e t y ,

h e l p i n g t o c o u n t e r a c t t h e f e e l i n g s o f f e a r o r d i s t r e s s

a s s o c i a t e d w i t h R S D . W h e n d e a l i n g w i t h A D H D a n d R S D ,

I ' v e h a d s u c c e s s u s i n g i m a g e r y e x e r c i s e s t o h e l p

i n d i v i d u a l s a c c e s s t h e i r i n n e r r e s o u r c e s a n d f o s t e r a s e n s e o f c a l m .

R e g u l a r l y u s i n g i m a g e r y t o c r e a t e a s a f e p l a c e o r a s a f e

m e m o r y c a n h a v e a p r o f o u n d i m p a c t o n o v e r a l l w e l l - b e i n g . B y c o n s i s t e n t l y r e v i s i t i n g t h e s e c o m f o r t i n g m e n t a l s c e n e s , y o u c a n t r a i n y o u r m i n d t o m o r e e a s i l y a c c e s s f e e l i n g s o f

s a f e t y a n d r e l a x a t i o n , e v e n i n t h e m i d s t o f c h a l l e n g i n g s i t u a t i o n s . T h i s p r a c t i c e n o t o n l y h e l p s i n c o p i n g w i t h

i m m e d i a t e s t r e s s o r s b u t a l s o c o n t r i b u t e s t o l o n g - t e r m e m o t i o n a l r e s i l i e n c e a n d s e l f - r e g u l a t i o n .

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RSD

Using Imagery for Safety Safe Place

Find a comfortable and quiet place to sit or lie down.

Close your eyes and take a deep breath in through your nose, hold it for a few seconds, and then slowly exhale through your mouth.

Imagine yourself in a place or with someone you love. It could be a memory or a fantasy.

Visualize the details of the scene. What colors do you see? What shapes and textures surround you?

Pay attention to the sounds and smells around you. Are there any particular scents or noises that stand out to you?

As you relax, try to incorporate more details into your imagination. Are you sitting or standing? What are you wearing? Is there a breeze, or is it still?

Allow yourself to be fully immersed in this scene and feel the emotions that come with it. Are you happy, content, or relaxed?

Take your time and enjoy the experience. Stay in this imagined scene for as long as you like, until you feel more relaxed and present in the moment.

When you are ready, take a deep breath and slowly open your eyes.

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Imagery for safety

Happy Memories

Find a collection of photographs that remind you of happy

memories. This could be physical photo albums or digital ones on your phone or computer.

Choose one photograph that resonates with you and take a few moments to observe every detail of the photo. Pay

attention to the colors, the expressions on people' s faces, the setting, and anything else that stands out to you.

Allow yourself to relive the emotions and sensations

associated with that moment. Remember how you felt, what you were thinking, and how the experience made you feel.

Think about the people you were with and how they made

you feel. Remember the sounds you heard and the smells in

the air. Allow yourself to fully immerse in the happy memory.

Stay with this memory and feeling for as long as you l ike, savoring the positive emotions i t brings up for you.

When you' re ready, move on to another photograph and repeat the process.

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RSD

Using Self Talk

Self-talk is a powerful tool that can help you regulate your emotions and calm yourself down in difficult situations. It involves using language to

communicate with yourself in a way that is kind, supportive, and reassuring. By using self-talk, you can help to reduce feelings of anxiety, fear, and stress, and promote feelings of calm, safety, and well-being.

Try generating a statement ahead of time that helps with safety and posting it somewhere to use when you have an episode.

1.Identify the situation that is causing you distress. This could be anything from a difficult conversation with a friend or family member, to a stressful work meeting, to a memory of a mistake

Use calming words or a mantra to remind yourself that you are okay and safe. The focus here is only on safety and calming yourself ,not making your feelings go away .For example ,you might say to your self,"This hurts, and I am scared but I'm ok ,"or"I am safe even though this feels awful."
Speak kind statements to yourself about your experience ,as if you were

talking to a friend or loved one. For example, you might say someth ing like, "It's okay to feel upset about this, but you're doing the best you can."

Repeat your self-talk as often as necessary to help you feel more calm and centered. You might find it helpful to write down your self -talk and read it

back to yourself whenever you're feeling overwhelmed or anxious.

RSD

Using Self Talk

R e m e m b e r , s e l f - t a l k i s a s k i l l t h a t t a k e s p r a c t i c e t o d e v e l o p .

B e p a t i e n t w i t h y o u r s e l f a s y o u l e a r n t o u s e i t . W i t h t i m e a n d p r a c t i c e , y o u c a n l e a r n t o u s e s e l f - t a l k a s a p o w e r f u l t o o l f o r c o p i n g w i t h l i f e ' s c h a l l e n g e s .

E x t e r n a l i z i n g l a n g u a g e i s e s p e c i a l l y h e l p f u l f o r w o m e n w i t h

A D H D b e c a u s e i t c a n g e t j u m b l e d u p i n s i d e o f y o u r h e a d .

B o n u s i f y o u c a n a s k y o u r s e l f w h a t y o u m i g h t n e e d t o f e e l

b e t t e r . · D o y o u n e e d a c u p o f t e a ? A b l a n k e t ? A h u g ? A r e s t ?

RSD

Using Distraction

Y o u c a n d o t h e s e a c t i v i t i e s t o d i s t r a c t y o u r s e l f w h e n y o u b e g i n r u m i n a t i n g a n d n e e d t o p u l l y o u r s e l f o u t o f y o u r h e a d . Y o u c a n d o t h e s e u n t i l y o u f e e l l e s s " i n

y o u r h e a d " o r l e s s f o c u s e d o n y o u r t h o u g h t s .

1 . F i n d a l l o b j e c t s i n y o u r e n v i r o n m e n t t h a t f i t a c e r t a i n c h a r a c t e r i s t i c , s u c h a s a l l o b j e c t s t h a t a r e g r e e n o r

s q u a r e . C o n t i n u e d o i n g t h i s e x e r c i s e u n t i l y o u f e e l m o r e c o n n e c t e d t o y o u r s u r r o u n d i n g s .

2 . C o u n t u p a n d d o w n a g a i n , a s h i g h a s y o u n e e d t o g o . F o r e x a m p l e , c o u n t 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 , t h e n 4 , 3 , 2 , 1 , u n t i l y o u f e e l m o r e c o n n e c t e d t o y o u r s u r r o u n d i n g s .

3 . Y o u c a n a l s o r e p e a t t h e w o r d s t o a s o n g , q u o t e , p o e m , o r p r a y e r t h a t i s m e a n i n g f u l t o y o u . Y o u c a n e v e n r e a d o r w r i t e i t o u t .

4 . T h i n k a b o u t t h i n g s y o u l o o k f o r w a r d t o o r a r e c u r i o u s a b o u t i n t h e n e a r f u t u r e .

5 . A n o t h e r o p t i o n i s t o p l a y c a t e g o r y o r c o n c e n t r a t i o n g a m e s o n y o u r p h o n e .

6 . T r y s i n g i n g a s o n g y o u k n o w w e l l i n y o u r h e a d o v e r a n d o v e r a g a i n u n t i l y o u f e e l l e s s " i n y o u r h e a d " o r l e s s f o c u s e d o n y o u r t h o u g h t s .

Self Awareness After an Episode

A f t e r y o u h a v e r e c o v e r e d f r o m a n e p i s o d e o f R S D a n d g a i n e d s o m e d i s t a n c e , y o u c a n e n g a g e i n s o m e r e f l e c t i o n . I f i t f e e l s h e l p f u l , a s k y o u r s e l f q u e s t i o n s a b o u t t h e i n c i d e n t .

H e r e a r e s o m e s u g g e s t i o n s t o p r o v i d e i n s i g h t :

C a n y o u d i s c u s s w h a t h a p p e n e d w i t h s o m e o n e y o u t r u s t t o g e t f e e d b a c k a b o u t i t ?

I f t h e R S D e p i s o d e w a s r e l a t e d t o s o m e o n e e l s e a n d y o u ' v e d e t e r m i n e d t h a t s o m e o n e h a s j u d g e d y o u , a s k y o u r s e l f i f t h a t p e r s o n ' s o p i n i o n t r u l y m a t t e r s .

I f t h i s e p i s o d e w a s r e l a t e d t o s o m e o n e e l s e , c o n s i d e r e v a l u a t i n g t h e p e o p l e y o u s p e n d t i m e w i t h . I f s o m e o n e c o n s i s t e n t l y c r i t i c i z e s , j u d g e s , o r t r e a t s y o u p o o r l y , t h e y m a y n o t d e s e r v e a p l a c e i n y o u r l i f e .

I f t h i s e p i s o d e i n v o l v e d s o m e o n e y o u l o v e a n d t r u s t , c o n s i d e r r e v i s i t i n g y o u r s e l f - a d v o c a c y n o t e s a n d s h a r i n g t h e m w i t h t h a t p e r s o n .

Self Awareness After an Episode

I m p o r t a n c e o f F e e d b a c k a n d M a k i n g M i s t a k e s

I n u p c o m i n g s e s s i o n s , w e w i l l d i s c u s s t h e i m p o r t a n c e o f m a k i n g m i s t a k e s a n d a d o p t i n g a g r o w t h m i n d s e t , c r u c i a l t o l e a d i n g a f u l f i l l i n g l i f e .

R S D c a n m a k e i t h a r d t o f u n c t i o n w h e n m i s t a k e s a r e p a r t o f t h e l e a r n i n g p r o c e s s . I f R S D p r e v e n t s y o u f r o m a c c e p t i n g f e e d b a c k , s u c h a s a t w o r k , t r y s a y i n g , " I a m w o r k i n g o n t h i s . " T h i s p h r a s e c a n s a v e y o u f r o m p o t e n t i a l e m b a r r a s s m e n t . A s s o o n a s y o u f e e l R S D b e i n g t r i g g e r e d , s a y t h i s t o y o u r s e l f , t h e n s a y i t o u t l o u d a n d n o d . T h i s i s o k a y t o d o .

RSD

4-7-8 Breathing

4 7 8 b r e a t h i n g i s a s i m p l e y e t e f f e c t i v e b r e a t h i n g

t e c h n i q u e t h a t c a n h e l p r e d u c e s t r e s s a n d a n x i e t y . I t i n v o l v e s t a k i n g a d e e p b r e a t h i n f o r a c o u n t o f 4 , h o l d i n g t h e b r e a t h f o r a c o u n t o f 7 , a n d t h e n

e x h a l i n g s l o w l y f o r a c o u n t o f 8 . T h i s t e c h n i q u e c a n b e d o n e a n y w h e r e a n d a n y t i m e y o u n e e d t o u s e i t .

S t e p 1 : U n d e r s t a n d i n g t h e T e c h n i q u e

L e a r n a b o u t t h e 4 7 8 b r e a t h i n g t e c h n i q u e b y

w a t c h i n g a v i d e o t u t o r i a l o r r e a d i n g a n a r t i c l e t h a t e x p l a i n s h o w t o d o i t .

1 9 21

RSD

Group or individual Exercise for RSD

O b j e c t i v e : T o d e v e l o p a n u l t i m a t e c o m p a s s i o n a t e i m a g e t h a t r e p r e s e n t s p u r e c o m p a s s i o n , c a r e , a n d k i n d n e s s t o w a r d s y o u r s e l f .

S t a r t b y c l o s i n g y o u r e y e s a n d t a k i n g d e e p b r e a t h s , s l o w i n g d o w n y o u r b r e a t h i n g , a n d r e l a x i n g .

2 . T h i n k o f c o m p a s s i o n , n o t i c e w h a t i m a g e s , t h o u g h t s , o r

f e e l i n g s a r i s e i n y o u . A l l o w w h a t e v e r i s t h e r e t o b e t h e r e , o r a l l o w t h i n g s t o c o m e a n d g o a s t h e y p l e a s e .

3 . A l l o w a n i m a g e t o a r i s e t h a t r e p r e s e n t s c o m p a s s i o n f o r y o u . T a k e y o u r t i m e t o d e v e l o p a n i m a g e t h a t s y m b o l i z e s a l l t h e t h i n g s t h a t g o w i t h c o m p a s s i o n . I f n o t h i n g c o m e s

i m m e d i a t e l y , t h a t ' s o k a y , j u s t t a k e y o u r t i m e a n d s e e w h a t e m e r g e s , n o m a t t e r h o w s t r a n g e i t m a y s e e m .

4 . D e v e l o p a n i m a g e t h a t h o l d s w a r m f e e l i n g s t o w a r d s

y o u , c o n v e y s a s e n s e o f u n d e r s t a n d i n g f o r y o u , f o r y o u r s t r u g g l e s a n d y o u r f e e l i n g s , s h o w s k i n d n e s s , c a r e , a n d

c o n c e r n f o r y o u r w e l l - b e i n g , a n d i s s t r o n g a n d w i s e a s i t s u p p o r t s y o u .

2 0 22

RSD

Group or individual Exercise for RSD

5 . N o t i c e i f t h e i m a g e i s o f a p e r s o n o r n o t , s o m e t h i n g r e a l o r i m a g i n e d , a n a n i m a l , s o m e o t h e r b e i n g , o r a n a s p e c t o f n a t u r e . I s i t y o u n g o r o l d ? M a l e o r f e m a l e ?

W h a t c o l o r s o r l i g h t a r e a s s o c i a t e d w i t h i t ?

6 . A l l o w y o u r s e l f t o f u l l y i m m e r s e i n t h e i m a g e a n d

n o t i c e h o w i t m a k e s y o u f e e l . W h a t p h y s i c a l s e n s a t i o n s i n y o u r b o d y g o w i t h t h e s e f e e l i n g s ? W h a t f a c i a l

e x p r e s s i o n d o e s t h e i m a g e d i s p l a y t o w a r d s y o u ? W h a t b o d y p o s t u r e o r s t a t u r e d o e s i t c o n v e y t o w a r d s y o u ?

H o w d o e s i t s o u n d o r c o m m u n i c a t e w i t h y o u ? W h a t

t h i n g s d o e s i t s a y t o y o u ? W h a t t o n e d o e s i t u s e ? W h a t d o e s i t d o t o h e l p o r c o m f o r t y o u ?

7 . S p e n d a f e w m i n u t e s j u s t a p p r e c i a t i n g t h i s i m a g e o f u l t i m a t e c o m p a s s i o n . P a y p a r t i c u l a r a t t e n t i o n t o t h e

c o m p a s s i o n a t e f e e l i n g s t h i s i m a g e g e n e r a t e s . S e e i f y o u c a n a l l o w t h e s e f e e l i n g s t o t a k e o v e r , t o g r o w i n s i d e

y o u , a l m o s t f e e l i n g y o u r w h o l e b o d y f i l l w i t h c o m p a s s i o n .

2 1 23

RSD

Group or individual Exercise for RSD

H o w t o u s e i t m o v i n g f o r w a r d

1 . C h o o s e t h e c o m p a s s i o n a t e i m a g e t h a t t r i g g e r s f e e l i n g s o f c o m p a s s i o n w i t h i n y o u , w h e t h e r i t ' s i m a g i n i n g g i v i n g

c o m p a s s i o n t o s o m e o n e o r c r e a t i n g y o u r u l t i m a t e c o m p a s s i o n a t e i m a g e .

2 . P r a c t i c e b r i n g i n g t h i s i m a g e t o m i n d r e g u l a r l y , d a i l y , a n d w h e n y o u a r e r e l a t i v e l y c a l m .

3 . S t r e n g t h e n t h e i m a g e b y u s i n g i t t o s p a r k c o m p a s s i o n a t e f e e l i n g s w i t h i n y o u .

4 . U s e t h e i m a g e d u r i n g t o u g h t i m e s w h e n y o u a r e e x p e r i e n c i n g e m o t i o n a l p a i n .

5 . R e m e m b e r t o s t a r t y o u r i m a g e r y p r a c t i c e w i t h a f e w r o u n d s o f s l o w b r e a t h i n g t o g e t y o u i n t h e m o o d f o r

c o m p a s s i o n .